Sunday, November 6, 2011

A Great Day for Uglaaay!

The full weight of my burden.  

Let me first start by saying how incredibly difficult that was.  I never hid the fact that I had a lot of student debt, but it's always been so personal that I've never wanted the exact number known.  Now my friends know, my family knows and even my significant other now knows too.  Getting to this point was one of the worst feelings I have ever known.  There are so many visceral emotions attached to every single dollar and every single cent of debt that I have accumulated.  

But now that it's done, the effect is actually liberating.  I finally feel like I can quit beating myself up for how I got here and just focus on moving forward.    

Today was a really rough day and I just don't have much energy left for this post.  I will say that I now understand just how wholly unprepared I was to make the decisions that I did when I was 18.  There will definitely be future posts on this, because I hope that by writing about my mistakes I can help someone else out there from repeating them. 

In the end, I made an investment in myself and I completed a challenging degree that I am immensely proud of.  Now I just need to remember that I didn't accumulate this debt overnight and it's not going to go away over night.  


  1. "I finally feel like I can quit beating myself up for how I got here and just focus on moving forward"

    That's a great place to be!

    I think it's also good to have that concrete number, less for you, but more for the folks in your life. So they can know exactly what you are working for.

  2. I know it's hard to post that number, believe me. I've posted my number here and there a few times, but never in quite that large of font...LOL. It's a very similar number, except mine was created not through an investment in myself, but through the stupidity of overspending. My number is getting smaller every month, and I'm confident that I'll see the day when it's zero.

    Keep pluggin' away at it, and you'll reach your goal before you know it!

  3. aw, thanks for the blog love, guys!

    @Amy I totally agree. At the very least I know my blog has gotten my youngest sister to re-think her college loan plans. Something that lecturing/advising/preparing her for the past two years could never change. Major victory! Great, now she will read this and reassert all that crappy teenage attitude... (just kidding, love you sister!) It's also helped me and GB (sig. other) grow a lot closer. He's been so supportive and on-board with all of my lifestyle changes. Though now that I think about it, he is the one person that directly benefits from my recent uptick in cooking... ;)

    @Travis If you're gonna go all out, you might as well go BIG too, lol Thanks for the words of encouragement. I just read through most of your blog tonight. I really appreciate your honesty and your sense of humor. P.S. I used to work just down the street from the 5-8. Juicy Lucy's galore. You might find this hard to believe, but I actually found a better burger( Just imagine cheese + pancetta + a fried egg. The Emma James, it's breathtaking.